Emergency Escape Device? Bungee Cord? Double Dutch Anyone?

So last week a friend of my significant other's made him a scarf...11 METERS LONG!  Yes, that's meters.  WTF?  What exactly is the point of that?  It's so long, he can barely wear it without it being a safety hazard.  The other day I took it out of the car while we were unloading a few things including our dog.  Part of it slipped from my grip while we were walking and fell on the ground, my dog got her leg caught in it and kept walking so it was pulling on me while I was on a sheet of ice and I almost slipped and fell right on my ass.  The friggin' thing is dangerous!  You would need to add on 10 extra minutes to your daily travel time for each time you needed to take it on and off.

Needless to say, he waited 2 years for this scarf because they had trouble meeting up and now he can't even really wear it.  We'll have to get a bigger apartment so this thing can have a room of it's own it's so big.  Gawd.  It's sitting on the kitchen table right now because it doesn't fit in the chair and I'm reminded of how retarded it is every time I go in there.  I'll have to hide it somewhere because it looks like a damn snake and I am terrified of snakes.  Hate the scarf.  Not sure how useful it will be as originally intended.  Maybe we can save our sheets and use it to escape out the window of our apartment in the event of a fire someday  (insert eye roll here.)  Thanks for the new family member, lady!     

Decisions, decisions.....

So yesterday my mom called me.  We talk often so this is not a surprise.  But she dropped yet another bomb on me (not necessarily a bad one) but a bomb nonetheless.  I am currently working for myself, I have done so on the side for years, even when I had a full time job.  In May of 2010, I got laid off from my very good paying job 3 weeks before the house I sold was to close which would enable me to buy another one shortly thereafter.  However, with no secure job I was not going to get a house.  I was SO pissed.  They knew I was trying to do that, couldn't they friggin' wait a few months?  I took some time for myself, then decided it was a good time to venture out completely on my own, working for no one but me.  Again, this makes it difficult to buy a home, because lenders don't like to give money to self-employed people and if they do, you'd better have a damn stable income of at least 3 years of constant work.  My significant other works at a bank part time and is a musician so we can't rely on his part time job to buy a house.  I've been struggling with the idea of renting in the city because you get very little for a lot of money and am considering moving a little out of the city to rent a house and have more space for WAY less money.  I will be honest, we are struggling financially and because of my self-employment I've dismissed buying a house anytime soon.

My parents are wonderful and have always been there to help me if I need it.  They, like most parents, want to see me happy and in a good place in life.  My parents hate to see me renting, and want to see me in a place of my own again.  Hence, the phone call.  See, about a month ago, my mom fell on some ice and broke her hip.  She'll be 65 tomorrow and pretty fit and active for her age so she's lucky it wasn't worse than it was. She spent a week in the hospital and has been home now for a little over 2 weeks.  Over the past few days, it has hit her that the fall could have been much worse, she could have hit her head and I could be without a mother right now.  She started crying, saying she couldn't bear the thought of leaving this earth and me having nothing.  She wants to see me taken care of, and wants me in a house of my own.  She's trying to convince me to go back to work for whatever time it takes for a lender to consider me in a stable job (some lenders 6 months, most a year) do what I need to do to get the house then go do what I want after I have it.  Now I'm starting to second guess my game plan.  I really dread the thought of working for someone else, but I really do want my own house again.  Dammit!  Now what?   

Bring It, Bi*ch!

Okay, so lemme give you a bit of background before I move on to my rant for today.  It will be minimal- I'll leave the details for another post.  I have known my "significant other" for 4 years, and been with him as a couple for 3 years.  He is a musician, drummer to be exact, and has spent over half his life in the industry.  He is currently the drummer for a Canadian artist who is part of another band project at the moment, and we don't know if he'll play a solo show again so that's on hold for now.  Even so, he's always played in cover bands to make extra cash (sometimes 2-3 at a time) and works at a bank during the day.  2 years ago, a friend of his got him a gig working in a cover band he was playing in that was super busy and looking for a drummer.  During one of the first gigs he played which I attended, he approached me at a break and told me that everyone in the band was contributing towards a sound system that the band leader has bought so they didn't have to rent equipment every gig.  Once it was paid off, then the payments would stop (obviously.)  Until then, everyone would contribute $12.50 per gig automatically deducted from each of their pay, so $50 for the band.  He wasn't thrilled about it, but because he was the new guy he didn't want to make waves so he said fine.  The sound system was paid off sometime before summer 2010.  By August 2009, the guy who started the band informed the other members he was leaving to play in another band.  Conveniently, he hadn't booked many gigs between September and December so it was slowing down AND he was the one in possession of the sound system.  So when another band member sent him an email on behalf of the rest of the band asking if he'd be leaving the sound system and they'd buy out his share, or if he'd be taking it and buying out their shares (which they assumed would be one of the other) his reply was ...wait for it...."No, you guys were renting it from me."  Um, EXCUSE ME?  Why the FUCK would the band agree to pay into a sound system they wouldn't own in the end, which is exactly what they were doing BEFORE they bought the sound system AND the reason for buying in the first place!  How the HELL is that any different and what exactly was the point of buying a system then, so they don't have to rent one anymore?  Oh, I know!  YOU would get to walk away with something OTHER PEOPLE paid for!!  The 3 remaining members of the band, and ME were friggin' flabbergasted.  I remember the exact moment in the car when we got the text message indicating his response.  This was news to all of them.  There was never any mention of renting to ANY of them, and if so, where's your rental agreement?  Wouldn't you have people sign a rental agreement so they wouldn't make any claims to it and there are no misunderstandings?  And why did they stop "renting" it once it was paid for?  Wouldn't you keep charging people that were renting something at every gig, and not stop just because it was paid for?  So, a store that rents out equipment should lend it out for free once the rental fees have covered the cost?  WTF??  So they let it go for a while, then one day they had a practice together with the new guitar player at the singer's house.  They called the band leader, told him they had a practice and needed the equipment.  Hell, they paid for it, they were entitled to use it, and as far as they were concerned it belonged to THE BAND.  When the bass player arrived with the equipment, he told the guys that the band leader was adamant the equipment be returned that afternoon.  Well, super pissed off, my guy decided at the practice that he was going to keep part of the equipment.  He paid for 1/4 of it, so he felt he had the right to use it as he pleased.  Besides, they felt if they had part of the system, they would have some leverage to come to an agreement with him.  The rest of the equipment was returned to him and my guy has been in possession of only a set of speakers.  To fast forward, he was less than impressed, has sent a tonne of threatening emails and lies over the past few months, then we've heard nothing from him since December or so.  Mostly because we blocked him from Facebook and email so we didn't have to read his retarded moronic rants anymore.  Until tonight...when the guy showed up at my guy's gig with a bunch of his friends in a town he doesn't live in, to hang out at that bar???  Random?  I think not.  He has now served my guy with small claims court papers, suing for the equipment, plus a microphone that he bought on behalf of my guy and he has already paid him back for!  Fucking jerk.  He claims to have a letter signed by the old drummer my guy replaced that HE understands the band was renting the equipment (funny that none of the other members have this recollection) AND he has falsified a document from the bass player who is STILL IN THE BAND, and who is my guy's FRIEND claiming the same thing.  Who the fuck does this guy think he's fooling?  Even if he did have a signed agreement with the other members of the band saying it was a rental (which he doesn't) he DOES NOT have one with my guy.  The other members were there first, and this retard has even told my guy in an email that he had NO CHOICE in the matter anyways because the agreement was in place when he joined and he HAD to accept that arrangement whether he wanted to or not.  He could have 15 other signed agreements with various people- if he doesn't have one with the person he's suing, he's SOL as far as I can see.  I just want to go over to his house (which is an hour away) and give him a swift kick in the junk.  I don't like people that try to take advantage of other people, and we are not going down without a fight.  Not only did he suck almost $600 out of my guy and didn't want to give him anything to show for it, he now wants $850 more!  Not only will there be a defense entered, but a counter-claim for the total cost of what my guy has put into that sound system.  I hope the other members of the band join in on the counter-claim and screw him right up the ass.  That is all.  :)  

A deserted island is looking more appealing each day...

More recently than ever before, I am starting to understand why people lose it.  You know- go "postal" and open fire in public places out of pure rage and frustration.  It's not right of course, but I understand.  Like seriously, who needs this kind of crap?  I grew up in a smaller northern Ontario town, and have been living in Toronto for over 15 years and let me tell you, I love the city but it could potentially drive the most level-headed person completely insane.  There are things about a city of 2.5 million that you just aren't exposed to living in a smaller town like, traffic, noise levels, everyone in a hurry to go nowhere fast and a sense of entitlement attitude.  Sure, there are advantages like close proximity to shopping, restaurants, and cultural events, but I'm at a point where fighting that level of traffic and rude people isn't worth the time it takes to get to these places anymore, and you can't even enjoy them when you do finally make it to your destination.  I wouldn't move back to the town I grew up in if you paid me, but living here is no longer what it was for me even 4-5 years ago, and things I loved when I moved here are starting to drive me nuts.  I'm tired of dealing with internet and cell companies that can't get their billing right, I'm tired of fighting the huge lineups at the grocery store, or the family of 15 that feels all of them need to go to Wal Mart together, or the ignorant woman that allows their child to scream at the top of their lungs in a restaurant and does nothing to stop it...the list goes on.  Sure, these things can be experienced no matter where you go, but in smaller doses they're easier to handle.  I'm tired of sighing every time I go out the door to face another day of battle, because it shouldn't be that way.  I want to enjoy the world, and enjoy my life and just be happy and lately I'm finding that really hard to do.  A few years back I went to Barbados.  I was sitting on a bus (their "buses" are VW vans) waiting to be taken to our hotel when this feeling came over me that nothing mattered.  It didn't matter what time it was, where we were or how long it was going to take to get to where were were going, because that's the attitude of the people there.  I said to my companion (about our life back home) "WHERE ARE WE GOING?  Where the f**k are we going so fast all the time?  We are in a hurry to go NOWHERE.  These people have it ALL right here."  All that mattered to me then, was that the sun was shining, and a breeze was blowing through my hair.  I know we all want to feel like that, but why does it need to be a treat, or something we can only dream of?  Why can't we experience this every day, or why can't that be what's normal, and not something we retreat to?  I'm almost ready to throw in the towel, give up all the phones, internet and cable, credit cards, cars, insurance and everything else that sucks the life out of us and live off coconuts in my little grass hut.  Anybody with me?  I will need (some) neighbors. :)

And so it starts.....

So here I am.  Blogging.  I have to say, that this is something I never really understood why people did and totally thought I'd never do, and here I am.  Blogging.  I never wrote in a journal as a kid and still don't have the desire to, but I find myself getting more and more frustrated every day with people, and the things they do.  So I am going to use this as an outlet for my frustration, possibly looking for answers from others, some insight into if I am justified in feeling the way I do and maybe gain some joy in the fact that maybe others experience the same things too.  I mean, I hope others don't because I wouldn't wish that on anyone, but GAWD is it just me?  Am I headed straight for the loonie bin?  I guess we'll see.  Stay tuned.  Elizabeth Singleton has arrived.  :)